Thursday, June 23, 2011

1st Annual NYHB Draft Drinking Game

Let's get right to it. Ten simple rules. Everyone wins. Good luck, be safe and enjoy.

Note: Don’t want people getting too bombed too quickly so each rule applies to taking a drink of beer, wine, etc. Though I’ve added some bonus rules for those folks (read: Bobcats fans) who might want to take a shot or twelve.

Take a drink...

1: ...any time someone says “wingspan”, “upside”, “tweener”, or “raw”. This alone should get you pretty wobbly. (Take a shot if someone says “freak” or “ambidextrous”).

2: …any time someone says “Dirk”, “Ginobili” or “Pau”. (Take a shot if anyone says "Tskitishvili", Darko”, or “Thabeet”).

3: …any time Jay Bilas says “has a chance to be special” or “tremendous length”.

4: ...any time a draftee puts on his new team’s baseball cap. (Take a shot if they put it on, take it off, look at it funny, adjust it, then put it back on.)

5: ...any time there is a trade.

6: ...any time a draftee or their mother cries. Take a shot if the father cries.

7: ...any time Stuart Scott pretends to be black. Take a shot if Fran Fraschilla pretends to be black.

8: ...any time the Knicks fans boo, sarcastically cheer or shout ‘ovah-rated’. Take a shot if they genuinely cheer.

9. ...any time someone compares and contrasts Jimmer and Kemba.

And finally, take a big ol' drink when...

10. ...David Stern hands over the draft announcements to Adam Silver at the start the second round.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Weekend Reading

  • Cavs GM Chris Grant feels his team is in "a good position to take advantage of whatever situation is there." Did someone say, $14.5 million trade exception?
  • Forum Blue & Gold looks at the Lakers trouble with attacking a zone defense.
  • Traveling! Or not! Hardwood Paroxysm breaks down Steve Nash's footsteps.
  • Congrats to George Karl on his 1000th win. Really nice to see him back coaching.
  • Baron Davis wants to play until he's 38. He should try playing while he's still 31.
And last but certainly not least...
  • Mark Cuban on Mikhail Prokhorov: "He's a pussy." Gee, tell us how you really feel, Mark.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

2010 NBA Draft Live Blog

For the record, here's how I think the top ten is going....

1. Washington - John Wall
2. Philadelphia - Evan Turner
3. New Jersey - Derrick Favors
4. Minnesota - Wesley Johnson (Predicting Kahn is like uh... impossible.)
5. Sacramento - DeMarcus Cousins
6. Golden State - Ekpe Udoh (Who the hell knows with this team?)
7. Detroit - Greg Monroe
8. Los Angeles Clippers - Al-Farouq Aminu
9. Utah - Ed Davis
10. Indiana - Paul George

7:00PM: Hold on, I'm getting some beer. Knowledge and swear words to commence shortly.

7:25PM: All times Eastern! Five minutes to go!

7:34PM: Some quick thoughts on Wall before he gets selected... he'll be better than Rajon Rondo and Derrick Rose, he will win Rookie of the Year (close contest over Cousins) and he will force Arenas out during the season if not sooner.

I'm guessing he'll be like a 18ppg, 7-7.5rpg, 9-10apg, 2stls kind of guy. Not right away, but soon.

7:35PM: Showing the Kwame selection footage. Then the 'head down going to court' Gilbert picture. John Wall, "Fuck this."

7:37PM: Wall goes #1. Yeah, but will he do the John Wall dance on the dais? Or as he calls it, The Me Dance. Draft Grade: A

7:42PM: Wall looks good. His Wizards hat? Not so much. Let's get some new colors. And a new name and logo. Suggestions?

Turner getting ready to go to 76ers. ZZZZZZZZZZZ. Wake me up when Kahn picks.

7:45PM: Evan Turner to the 76ers. I guess I like this pick. They need help everywhere and I think he can play the 3, handle the ball when Holiday sits... but is he a superstar? Definitely not. A star? Eh. I see him making one or two All-Star teams, that's about it. Also, Andre Iguanadon stays at the 2, is no longer the man, sulks, is traded, yada yada yada... Draft Grade: B

7:46PM: Geez, last time Washington had the #1 pick they got Kwame. Last time Philly had the #2 they got Keith Van Horn. I don't know what this means but it's alarming.

7:49PM: Derrick Favor to the New Jersey Cosmonauts. I really like Favors but this draft just feels somewhat weak at the top to me. More on that later. Draft Grade: A-

7:53PM: David Kahn is on the clock! David Kahn is on the clock! David Kahn is on the clock!

And with the fourth pick the Minnesota Timberwolves select Isaiah Rider!

7:54PM: I love Wes Johnson. In about the 6-9 pick range. Not at four when he's 37 years old and there's a potential franchise center still on the board. Draft Grade: B-

Kings on the clock and they are definitely taking Cousins. Or Greg Monroe. No it's going to be Cousins. Definitely.

8:00PM: Cousins to the Kings. Damn. Pistons fans everywhere shed some tears. Cousins and Tyreke Evans is a fearsome, physical duo. They have a workhorse in Carl Landry and now they're a shooter away from getting kinda scary. Draft Grade: A.

8:04PM: Now comes the goldurn Golden State Warriors. Who the hell knows what they're going to do? Aminu? Udoh? Monroe?

Jon Barry concurs with me on Landry. Barry is bald. I have a full head of luscious locks. On to the 3rd beer.

8:06PM: GSW take Ekpe Udoh! Woo hoo! Pistons are going to get Greg Monroe! Don't screw this up, Joe! Don't screw this up, Joe! Draft Grade: B

8:07PM: For the record, I like Udoh. Yes, he's older than Wes Johnson's dad, but you know what you're going to get with him. He's a good kid... er, old man.

8:10PM: Also for the record, if Detroit selects Ed Davis or Al-Farouq Aminu I'm going to punch a hole in the wall. If they select Cole Aldrich I'll put my head through the wall.

8:14PM: Fuck yes. Whole big post on Greg Monroe coming later. Another thoughtful, good kid. Draft Grade: A

8:18PM: Los Angeles Donald Sterling Dipshits are on the clock. Aminu here? I actually like Aminu going #8 and he's a good fit for them. All of the early mocks that had Aminu in the Top 5 were a joke. Somehow the Clip Joint will fuck this up.

8:18:30PM: It is Aminu. He's wearing cool glasses. Stu Scott: "He's a descendant from a line of Nigerian kings." Well, shit. Hopefully his ACLs have some royal blessing placed upon them. Good luck in LA, Al-Farouq!

8:21PM: So going by voice and demeanor, Al-Farouq is like a 6'9" Urkel. He just earned some more points in my book. If Aminu tracks as a 4 and not a 3, he could be a nice bench player backing up Blake Griffin. Time for another beer. Draft Grade: B

8:25PM: With the ninth pick in the 2010 draft the Utah Jazz select the white guy. Next. Draft Grade: C+

8:32PM: The Indiana Pacers select... Paul George. So I had nine of the top ten guessed correctly and the one I missed was the white guy going to Utah. It seemed too obvious. Sacre bleu! Draft Grade: B

Going to keep up with the updates for each pick through the lottery and then do some 5 pick summaries through the first round. Bathroom breaks increasing. Food for thought: why was this draft order so easy to predict this year?

8:37PM: The North Orleans Hornets select Cole Aldrich. I am NOT a Cole Aldrich fan, at least not at #11. Solid pick in the #14-16 range. You may think that's nitpicking, but it's important. Does Cole make CP3 want to stay in New Orleans? Does he push Emeka Okafor for minutes? Cole Aldrich's ceiling is lower than his 6'9"-in-socks height. Though, I hear he's funny. Draft Grade: C

8:42PM: Never mind. Hornets are trading Alrich and Mo Pete to OKC for draft picks. Decent enough move on both sides. New Orleans can get some quality guys late in the first round now, for less money than they would've been paying the #11 pick. Trading Mo Pete always helps your team. Tentative Amended Draft Grade for NOH: B+ (Good move trading down by a cash-strapped team)

8:46PM: Memphis takes Xavier (Zah-vee-ay... don't you love it?) Henry. Great pick at the twelve. Is Jerry West still calling the shots in Memphis? Xavier's dad said 'Work hard'... take a drink! Draft Grade: B+

Other phrases I'm drinking to: "He's got a tremendous wingspan", "upside", and "boo ya".

8:50PM: With the 13th pick the Toronto Raptors select Chris Bosh's eventual replacement... we hope... Ed Davis. David Stern has wider shoulders than Ed Davis. Ah, the kid is tenacious. Hate taking Ed Davis in the 7-10 range. At 13? Nice pick up. Draft Grade: A-

Ed's dad Terry, another former pro, says 'work hard'. Drink!

8:55PM: Last pick of the lottery belongs to Planet Houston. They take General Zod.

Or Patrick Patterson. Third Kentucky player selected. Bit of a reach at #14, but not too bad. Draft Grade: B

Picks 15-17:

15: Milwaukee - Larry Sanders (VCU) I like this pick. This is also why Gadzuric was expendable. Heh heh.
16: Minnesota - Luke Babbitt (Nevada) Babbitt had a lot of 'heat' coming into the draft, projected as high as #8. He fell back to a more appropriate landing spot. Again, huge reach in the #9-12 range, not a bad pick at 16. Would I be surprised if he was out of the league in 4 years? No. Still, he could be a solid role player and having a long career. One of "those" guys.
UPDATE: Babbitt traded with Ryan Gomes to Portland for Martell Webster. Webster and Wes Johnson on Minny? David Kahn like redundancy.
17: Chicago picks for Washington - Although Stu and JVG discuss the potential pick as if it's going to Chicago. This is dumb. This pick is going to Washington, let's discuss it in those terms guys. And the pick is... Kevin (Ke-VEEN) Seraphin from France. Somewhere, Durant contemplates a pronunciation change.

Picks 18-21

18: OKC - Take Eric Bledsoe (Kentucky). Westbrook, Maynor, Harden, now Bledsoe... not to mention Durant, Green, Ibaka, Aldrich up front. For the record, I love the Thunder. Celtics fans bummed Bledsoe no longer available. UPDATE: OKC trades Bledsoe to the Clip Joint. Yeah, ok.
19: Boston - Stu Scott asking Jon Barry about Doc Rivers' mindset, "Does it change things if Rasheed retires, Ray Allen is not there, and Kevin Garnett can not battle back from injury and be the player he's been throughout his career?" No, Stu, it wouldn't change things. You fucking twit. Also, the Celtics took Avery Bradley (Texas). Defensive stopper at the PG, Boston finally gets a backup for Rondo.
20: South Antonio - James Anderson (Oklahoma State) I agree with Jay Frankenstein Bilas, Anderson shouldn't have dropped this far. Shades of DeJuan Blair. Spurs do it again.
21: North Orleans (via OKC) - Craig Brackins. Eh, mebbe four of five picks too high, excellent choice at the top of the second round. NBA is loving these undersized, bulldog power forwards now. Trends are weird.

Picks 22-25

22: Portland - Elliot Williams (Memphis) Lame duck GM Kevin Pritchard says "fuck you Blazers."

Side note:
Even though the Pistons have selected Monore, the team has not given up trying to deal for DeMarcus Cousins, according to a report from Yahoo!

23: Minnesota - Trevor Booker (Clemson) First senior to go in the draft. Hey, another undersized physical power forward! I miss the days when power forwards looked like Rick Mahorn and Charles Oakley. UPDATE: Minnesota trades Booker to the Washington Crazy Fucks with the 56th for the 30th and 35th picks.
24: Atlanta - Damion James (Texas) Another guy who slipped a bit. Should mesh pretty well in the Hawks, uh, "system".

Haha, Stu said Quincy 'Poindexter'. What a fool. Quick thought: If Hassan Whiteside falls to the 2nd round in the middle of a forest, would anyone notice?

25: Memphis - Dominique Jones (South Florida) Forget the previous Jerry West comment.

Will Daniel Orton go in the 1st round? Tick, tick, tick...

Picks 26-30

26: OKC - Quincy Pondexter (Washington) The Thunder just get good solid players. They are the NBA team you take home to mother.
27: Brooklyn Bears - Jordan Crawford. Nice! But... he's traded to Atlanta. Ah, fucking Cosmonauts.
28: Memphis Grizzly Bears - Pick for the 19th time and take Greivis Vasquez. Greivis is jacked up about it. JVG is 'so happy for that kid'. JVG's happy face is just as frightening as all his other faces. Greivis thanks God (drink!) and talks about Memphis' excellent roster with Rudy Gay and Oh Yay Mayo... hee hee. Racism.
29: Rolando - Daniel Orton (Kentucky) Stu, "History is made. The..." Oh, I don't even have the strength anymore. Basically, John Calipari can recruit. Whoo hoo. For the record, I like the look of Daniel Orton, solid NBA body. If he works at it, he can be a nice rotation player, maybe more.
30: Washington - Lazar Hayward (Marquette) Few picks too high. Pretty surprised Whiteside fell right out of the 1st round. Eh. Whatevs.

That's it for the first round. Very few surprises. A few guys fell, but nothing crazy. More thoughts and analysis to follow in the coming hours and days on this blog, Facebook, and something called Twitterwhipple. Or whatever.